Pregnant Belching Stories

dil (d) has lo love you ...

Dear Dr. Berlin,

I must make you a confession! Although it still so difficult to get the truth just has to light. I have sinned, and I regret it deeply. No, I was not part of your dubious mortgage business.
I had yesterday issued an unauthorized manner on your territory and was riding a mountain bike on the mountain Ulrich! And I've just ignored the clearly visible prohibition information for cyclists, but also feels like 17 times my saliva left by the wayside. Animals respectively hiking ( known also no longer wanted to) came through to me attributable to the violations of laws not to harm.

you might be noted to ask how it was possible that a polar bear learned how to mountain biking. Legitimate objection, but - you are probably best know to occur in this irrational society always such phenomenon and incomprehensible events. The metamorphosis from a semi-successful and pseudo-aristocratic financial juggler the CEO of a supposedly "systemically important" to carry out banking, is a wheel-propelled polar bears pretty close. Or?

"property need roots," they write in a strange policy statement . Therefore, bringing the number of roots on the way to Ulrich mountain summit, or is it only notorious law-breakers to fall? With me, you have failed - "Damn , I'm still alive", I can say. I am the way, come to my attention that you are always looking for talented PR consultant . I could offer you my services, that would be financially quite lucrative for you. I master the German language and can do so as if I knew what I was writing / talking about. The present text but it still sounds good, right?

"He enjoys high personal and professional recognition in leading business circles, industry and private addresses." The reading on the website of one of your (bogus) company. If I can do well, but would prefer the following variant: ". He extraordinary intrapersonal and industry enjoys reputation in elite spheres of economy and production, and nepotistic addresses" Sensational, do not you think? The polar bear as a master the linguistic high school. But if we are on revelations: your fashion style I always found rather tasteless .

"The absence of long-term concepts is a reflection of the lack of infrastructure and the cultural deficit," write more in your pamphlet. If it were only the cultural gaps that! This country but is missing much more - intellect and vision, for example. That reminds me of another bit ... On the way Ulrich Berg, I am also with one of your friends came by. At the Inn of the small Harald. You know - the recent three decades ago has become a member of the Carinthian Government, the young in his life, not much more than the parental land and restaurant, the premises of Klagenfurt "Almeida Mata from the dairymen Hari" and the now nationalized system banks, and the office and probably various body openings (as evidenced by the presumption of innocence) of its large instructor has seen. Sounds almost to the anti-thesis of a equipped with vision and cosmopolitan, boundless curiosity adolescents ... Excuse the digression, Doctor!

I would like to close by once again for forgiveness for my breaking the law, the completely unnecessary and arbitrary intrusion into your private Territory ask. Whether it will never happen anymore, I can not promise, however. There is no one was hurt - in my household budget and intentional acts are not charged tax payers ex post in the millions. I therefore hope that your esteemed understanding!

Sincerely,

Helmut polar bear

PS1: If the esteemed reader want to write to Dr. Berlin. Here you will get ... tberlin@berlin-co.com .

PS2: For the linked Handelsblatt article would say the polar bear yet, that the gentleman from Berlin breeds (or from Hannover), not only highland cattle but also sheep goggles. This knowledge comes from well-informed circles ...

PS3 for this entry is of course the Unschuldsvermtung!

How Do I Measure My Head For A Helmet

who never loses ...

" Carinthia lost forever " drummed the honorable Georg Holzer a few days full of emotion, anger, incomprehension and fighting spirit in the keypad, so a rousing contribution to the Carinthian Land Day on 10 afford to October. Lines that were not on the past without pondering whether polar bears. Therefore offer the following comments a form of replication that are not formulated for a change in the third person. "Carinthia is lost forever" with many aspects I can identify the content - in some areas I disagree, I would like to bring counter-arguments, questions, or perhaps one or the other approach.

Emigration in Vienna, Graz, etc., or abroad in Carinthia is definitely not a phenomenon in recent years. "The squeeze on mental capacity, the country has to suffer this is not just bad. He is existentially dangerous, "writes Georg Holzer. We have been experiencing years. The country (and the thinking of many people living here) has for decades been countless numbers become too small - whether cultural sector, industry experts and technology-affine contemporaries. The political representatives (no matter which political party they belong too) have never tried to stop these trends, but was uncomfortable and lateral thinking people simply go left to minimize the resistance.

I maintain that this development, this breaking can in principle be essential for personal maturation of individuals. This is not the problem, but it has to be why are so aptly: "If you went, never came back again." What's behind it? Why almost no one comes back? Are the only economic considerations, and monetary incentives to occupation elsewhere really that much better? Intellectual emptiness and mental inertia are a general social problem that is becoming increasingly obvious. And we all are at least partly responsible for this mess because we fall back into "internal emigration " or simply emigrate. Because we accept a culture of indifference and bigotry and just offend so do not want.

I am one of those who have moved out to Catholics around this -rural milieu behind. The refused to be captivated by the latent depressive tendencies. I have bathed in Swiss sulfur water, experienced Turkish tea time in the rock of Gibraltar laughed, cried if the beauty of the ocean that annoyed me about the Lower Austrian state politics (which is also doomed to mediocrity), the elegance Faroese Sheep admired, barefoot dancing on Broadway, indulged in Moscow several distillates and exceptional cultural achievements, am climbing in South African mountains, hiked with flip-flops through canyons and got insulted with broken Russian corrupt police officer, speaking on Austrian politics and the Orange Revolution, in townships even drink beer etc ...

I came back a few years ago to Carinthia. Maybe even me to prove that such a return can work without a moral to rot. Whether the exercise is successful, I do not judge. Whether I'm here to stay or Carinthia but there is just a stop and I will give up again? Currently, I agree with the threat of Georg Holzer: I'm staying here! Granted, I probably also somehow arranged with the states - but not with the responsible decision makers and leaders. Are listening to my criticism repeatedly / get read / view - in the form of small pinpricks . I will not allow anything new in this country is seen first as a threat. I will make others more aware of it and I do not ban outside the box can be. I will reduce my own prejudices and continue see the good in people and try to promote. This country is too beautiful and diverse to give it up to it once and pushed into the losers corner. That should and will neither beer guides, campground operators still succeed nor large farmers, or Kaiser-starter egg suppliers. Let us learn from the look in the abyss, we breathe the air flowing out of the trenches and we use it to give our voice heard rather than run away. Let us develop a common vision for this country!

And yes, there are a lot of this country better could represent direct and as streamers ingers, Dörfl ingers and Martinziganserln. One day they will hopefully get the chance to prove it. Will succeed only if we all work on it - parents, have teachers in kindergartens and schools, friends, colleagues, acquaintances, exile-Kärntner, returnees, Tourists, visitors, business people, intellectuals and dreamers, Tramps and clowns this society we hear again and seriously. Only then will we deserve the victory over mediocrity ...